Marriage not a do or die affair: Betty Irabor


Florence Uwaeme

The Nigerian social media space has been agog with the viral video of Dr. Ifeyinwa Angbo, who was battered by her husband and the sudden intervention of the Benue state governor for their reconciliation. Many people have waded in with their views and opinions on the issue.
One of such persons is the quintessential Betty Irabor, the socialite, author, editor and mother, who has been married for over 36 years, took to her Instagram handle to advice women who find themselves in abusive relationships to put themselves first.
She wrote, ” dear Women in abusive relationships..
1. Marriage is not a do or die affair especially when you are the one likely to die from abuse or end up in a psychiatric hospital as a living dead.
2. For better for worse doesn’t mean you should romanticize suffer head especially when you’re being used as a beast of burden or punch bag which triggers mental psychological trauma.
3. “Till death do us part” doesn’t mean that you stay on till you die and carried out in a coffin because you’re staying for your children and “God hates divorce.” Is it God’s will for you to be brutalised and sent to a premature grave without fulfilling his purpose for your life? .
4. ”In sickness and in health” does not mean you should stay married to a psycho. Protect your own health.
5. Do not allow third parties talk you into staying when you alone know the dangers ahead. Leave while your legs can still carry you.
6. You’re by far better off alone and alive to tend to your children than leave them for a step mother or family whose love interest may not include your children.
7. Please, please, we understand you’re afraid of starting all over, but please stop sabotaging efforts made by domestic violence activists to rehabilitate you after you’ve cried out for help.
Stop running back to the vomit
No! Half a loaf is not better than none. Don’t let society and peer pressure rush you.
Your life is gold. You are a precious diamond. If you can’t see that, no one else will.