Exclusive: We Don’t Kill People To Sustain Our Business – PH Coffin Dealers

By Kelechi Esogwa-Amadi

The coffin business is usually treated with disdain and fear in some communities in Nigeria as many people see it as very secretive, occultic, mysterious or even diabolical.

Investigations reveal that in such communities, coffin dealers, otherwise known as undertakers, are not allowed to operate. There is wide belief among Nigerians that coffin dealers always pray for people to die so that their business will boom, as bereaved people will be forced to buy coffins to bury their dead relatives.

But despite this, the coffin business seem to be booming, especially in Rivers State, the oil rich treasure base of the nation where families spend huge sums of money to bury their loved ones.

For instance, every weekend, expensive funerals take place in the riverine areas of the state, particularly in Kalabari Land, Opobo, Bonny and Okrika where burial ceremonies look like parties. As a result, coffin sellers/undertakers in Port Harcourt are believed to be capitalising on this to increase the cost of their services and appear to be having a field day, as most of them have introduced the use of expensive gaskets and vehicles such as Hummer, Lexus and Infinity Jeeps as ambulances to convey corpses, if their clients can afford to pay for such services.

The cost of conveying a corpse with any of these jeep-ambulances within Port Harcourt, TPCN gathered, ranges from eighty thousand to one hundred and fifty thousand naira, depending on the amount of time distance to be covered.

However, when confronted with the allegation that they are enjoying a booming business and taking advantage of bereaved people by increasing the cost of caskets and ambulance services, some of the coffin sellers interviewed by TPCN recently denied the allegation. They maintained that the business is not flourishing as many people think, insisting that the cost of manufacturing or importing the caskets make it difficult for them to make good profit most of the time.

They also denied contributing to the high rate of deaths witnessed in recent times, adding that they do not need to make any human sacrifice to sustain their business. Most of them blamed the high rate of deaths in Nigeria on the increasing rate of depression and hardship in the country.

Chief Chuks Abara, the Managing Director of C-K Undertakers, said: “People think that the undertaking business is a secret cult but it is not so. They are just being ignorant. I know that we as Nigerians and especially Christians don’t like to hear anything about death and that is why we see coffin sellers as evil or occultic people. Some people don’t even like associating with coffin dealers except when they are bereaved; that is when they come near us. But it is not supposed to be like that because death is a necessary end for every human being and especially for Christians who believe that they will go to heaven. If they don’t die, how will they go to heaven?”

On the allegation that coffin sellers pray for people to die so that they will sell their coffins and get undertaking contracts, Chief Abara said it was not so. He added: “How can we contribute to the death of people when we also die? It is not so. We coffin dealers have conscience and we are also Christians. Right from the time of Adam, before we started our business, people have been dying in this world and when they died, they were also buried. Are we the ones that killed them? Even Jesus died and was buried by Joseph of Arimathea, according to the bible. Will anybody now accuse Joseph of Arimathea of killing Jesus so that he could bury him and make a name for himself? No. So, we are only doing our business. We don’t pray for anybody to die but we know that people must die and when they die, they will be buried. Christians bury their people with coffins. It is only Muslims that don’t bury people with coffin.”

On the allegation that coffin sellers are having a field day in Port Harcourt, he said: “Well, I will not say that the business is a total flop but I can say that it is not that lucrative as people think. The business has its own challenges, especially with the bad economic situation. But please let me sound it clearly again that we don’t pray for people to die for our business to move forward.”

In Marine Base, which is one of the hubs of coffin business in Port Harcourt, coffin sellers also lamented of dwindling fortunes in their business.

Donald Sunday, a young coffin seller in the area, said he had been in the business for four years but had not made much money. He said: “I can tell you that the business is okay but not as people think. There used to be money in it but that was when things were good, not now that things have gone bad. Before, you will tell people price and they will pay. Now, it’s not like that again. They will price and price and tell you how much they will pay. But God is helping us. Coffin sellers are not bad people and we don’t pray for people to die as they claim.”

When TPCN went to OMC Funerals at Aggrey Road, Port Harcourt, to interview them, in the course of the investigation, a mild drama ensued. The lady receptionist, after listening to the TPCN reporter’s explanation about his mission, said she was not in the position to talk but that the manager was around. TheTPCN reporter then told her that it was even the manager that he would like to talk to and asked her to inform him thus. The receptionist went to the manager’s office but returned with this disappointing message: “He said that the Managing Director is not around.

TPCN gathered that coffins in Aggrey Road and other places in Port Harcourt are more expensive than those in Marine Base, due to the fact that most Marine Base coffins are constructed at the Plank Market there, popularly referred to as Plank Shade. Our investigation revealed that most undertakers who have their shops in highbrow areas of Port Harcourt like Aggrey Road, GRA and Aba Road, go to Marine Base to construct or buy coffins and resell at higher prices in their shops.

A masonia wood-coated coffin constructed in Marine Base, for instance, could be sold between eighty to hundred and fifty thousand naira, depending on the quality of accessories used to decorate it, whereas in the highbrow areas, where the coffins are well packaged in show rooms, it could go for between two hundred and three hundred thousand naira.

But Marvel Ekechi, another undertaker, who said he imports coffins into Port Harcourt and sells to the dealers on demand, added that another key factor that determines the price of coffins is the bargaining power of the buyer.

In his words: “No matter how beautiful or glamorous a coffin looks, it cannot buy itself. It is somebody that will buy it and if the buyer insists on a certain price, the seller will have only two choices – to sell or not sell. But then for how long will you keep your coffin in your show room without selling it? At some point, the dealer will be forced to sell. One thing I know is that in this business, the level or status of the buyer can also affect the price. If they want to bury a senator or governor for example, you can be sure that the quality and price of the coffin they will buy will be high. If the price of that coffin is two hundred thousand naira, they can increase it to five hundred thousand naira and they will buy because the money is there.”

Although most coffin sellers approached by TPCN for their contributions declined comments, fuelling suspicion that they could have some skeletons in their cupboards, this investigation has succeeded in uncovering two things. One: not all coffin dealers are evil. Two: as long as people continue to die, the coffin business will continue to thrive, whether the economy is good or bad.

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