Florence Uwaeme
Ever had a visitor stayed over at your place for a couple of days or weeks? Was your visitor of good behaviour or they totally forgot they were visitors and took over your house. Were they unruly?
Some people honestly do not know how to respect boundaries within their circle. Hence their boss-like attitude even when you’re harbouring them. This attitude, however, has led to the severity of many relationships.
Courtesy demands you be of your best behaviour when you’re a visitor. Courtesy also demands you go with your personal effects like; towel, toothbrush, toothpaste, hair net/shower cap and others. At least, try as much as you can to keep things as you met them and ensure not to overstep your bounds. The thread below is that of hosts that have had bad/unruly visitors. Here are their stories.
“A visitor came to my house to sleepover to leave the next day.
I left for work early while she went about her business in town.
She came to my office on her way to the bus park, and said “see your bag!”, smiling.
I realized she was carrying my new designer handbag that was a gift. I was saving it for a slay day.
I was weak and numb as I realized she had used it the whole day.
Every excitement about rocking the bag left me.
I let her go with it because I was so annoyed. I asked my flatmate why she allowed her to carry it. She said she told her it was new and she said her bag had spoilt.
To my surprise she returned it months after, dirty and tattered.
Some humans are very insensitive.
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“When I was in FUTO then, one that practically begged me to accommodate her because I was staying alone then in a self-con, that she got admission in poly Nekede but no accommodation. I allowed her to stay with me and was practically feeding her.
Only for me to travel, she brought in her friend to stay with her, they turned my room upside down.
I came back, from the entrance everywhere was smelling, my lodge guys saw me and called me. So I dropped my bag outside to greet them, they were like who were those girls in my room, that they are so dirty, that thank God I was back.
I opened the door cos I had my own key, I saw all my pots and plates were lying dirty on the floor( I had 4 pots then, and had never used all at once, cos once I use, I wash and reuse)
The whole room was smelling, dirty clothes and undies everywhere, the toilet was used and not flushed, I felt like throwing up. Luckily they came back immediately, I was so pissed off that I didn’t know when I slapped her and started shouting at them. I made them clean up my room, wash the plates and toilet, then their clothes. The next day, I asked them to leave my room.
I later found out that they took some of my jewellery and watch that my hubby’s
(then fiancé) brother bought for me from Germany. That one pained me, I called them and they denied seeing it.
“Uni days, she came to stay with me and my younger sister, then we didn’t have water in the compound, my sis and I will fetch water and she will bath with it. I will use my money to coo, she will eat and keep the plate for my sis to wash. She will use her money to buy recharge card just to make calls, she was bossing around like the president’s daughter in my house. One day, I travelled and when my sis couldn’t take it anymore she called my mum and that was the end of her stay with me.
Uni days, my roomie introduced a lady to me as her friend that she wanted to stay with us for a few days. The few days became weeks.
We became a little friendly and then one day, I got back from class and met the padlock to my locker in a funny state. It looked like someone was trying to forcefully open it and didn’t succeed.
I knew it was her because she was alone in our room when I returned.
In the end, my roomie had to tell the truth that that girl was a stranger.
They met on the road one early morning as she was returning from morning prayers.
She had asked her for sanitary towel and from there became a guest who didn’t want to leave.
I was livid because of the danger she put me through harbouring a total stranger.
What if she harmed either of us while we were asleep.
She was full of lies and ended up paying her back with evil as she started badmouthing her to everyone.
“I once housed someone that wasn’t really my friend. She asked to stay for the weekend and sort out her clearance ish. One weekend turned into a month, then 6months. She had the guts to start her masters in my house. I went home for the holidays and she had invited her sister and her boyfriend over. I am very particular about leaving my things how I arranged them, they rearranged my room to their taste, finished my foodstuff for the semester. I got back home and she was neither sorry nor ready to leave my house. To think I just rented the place when she moved in, I ended up leaving the house for her and moved elsewhere. Was a hellish 7months.
Then there was another one that came to my house, used the sponge in my bathroom to bath thinking it was mine, only for me to tell him it was the sponge I use to scrub my bathroom he used.
How do you get off bathing with people’s sponge and using their personal effects?
“When I was in 100 level, I haven’t even stayed up to one month in my lodge when this girl asked me to accommodate her and I agreed. Hmm, the aunty would cook rice, stew and soup with the only three pots I had and when I come to cook, I won’t see a pot to use. One day she was cooking for her village people like usual and finished my gas. Lol, she waited until I returned from the tutorial with one wicked hunger. I carried myself to the kitchen to cook, my gas tank was empty.
I had to tell her that I could only accommodate her for one more week.
“I had a visitor who wasted my gas boiling water to bathe in the hot afternoon for weeks, it was so annoying cos Kaduna was extremely hot that period. I couldn’t wait for her to leave, I hate wasteful people.
“One Aunty came visiting with her kids she came with empty dusting powder and when she was leaving left with our new dusting powder and was still arguing that the old one is for us. My mom just said we should let her be.
“My friend came to visit and hide my wig inside her shoe, lol I look for this wig I no see, one day, I was cleaning the house, I saw the wig carefully wrapped in her headscarf inside her shoe, I lose the wrap, went to a saloon for them to wash and treat it. Then the next day I wore the wig, the girl felt embarrassed because of shame, she packed her load and left.
“Seeing me cooking, he yelled repeatedly: “that pepper you’re adding is too much o. I don’t like too much pepper” When I hadn’t offered to share my dinner with him.
“A friend asked me to harbour a distant friend of his for just one day, I grudgingly agreed, seeing my actual friend did something good for me in the past that I felt the need to return the favour. I left for work, came back to see the stranger in bed with 2 ladies, they were having a threesome. Girls were moaning aloud and boy was feeling on top of the world. This whole thing happened on my favourite bedsheet! Did you hear me? My FAVOURITE BEDSHEET. I did not talk, I’m used to wordless anger. Dude carried his bag as the girls were leaving, so he’d lodge and finish up. As I’m typing this self, I still feel enraged.
“This was in school. Came to do something, so she had to a sleepover.
She wasn’t with a towel. I went for lectures and came back to meet my wrapper wet. Finished showering and used my wrapper as her towel. I wasn’t even close to this person. I stopped using it immediately
