On my way home the other day , I found a girl and she was sad and broken, and was looking for solace in a continent of sorrows. I’d offered consolation in the silence of my soul and because I was dealing with my own demons, I paid little attention to her silent call for help. It was not in my position to help I said and moved on with my life.
I just stared and pitied the misery that was someone’s else’s daughter, drenched in sweat of her disappointments. But I would find her at a Cafe two days later, bored and uninspiring, desperately trying to shake off the dust of her lost. I understand the times and the energy that such blowback takes from someone. Twice had I looked at her, and twice did she wince, with her eyes communicating words that were too heavy for her mouth to utter.
“Are you the girl that wailed at no 6 the other day” I had asked and maintained a dreadful facial expression yet it underlined pity.
She stared with a negative look at everything, even the smile that I had struggled to muster had irked her. I guess it was just politely useless. The minutes were akin to a cold war and her eyes searched the face and then the soul for traces of mockery. But I had come in peace, and prepared to listen too. The energy was unfamiliar but it gave hope, that there was nothing I can’t do. That was the only gift time permitted me to give.
She nodded after something that looked like an eternity. “Can I sit with you?” I asked again! She nodded away her ability to speak. It was picture perfect and I for one understand the burden of words on a heart that has been broken.
“Wanna talk about it?” I said!
“Perhaps, she replied! “but you will have to tell me the value of your interest” she said!
“Well, I am not happy too. Thieves invaded my compound and took all my clothes”
“That’s funny” she said!
“It isn’t” I countered.
“I think the guys that did that like you a lot and a little better than themselves”
“How do you mean? Do you steal from people you like?
” I don’t but some persons do. It is all about the expression of likeness. Some people, for example, like taking advantage of the other person’s weaknesses and you don’t have to define it beyond the theories of likeness”
“Am I permitted to disagree with your hypothesis? Your theories are everything but right”
“You even take permission to disagree with someone?”
“Yes. It is a new feature in human interaction”
“That’s funny”
“But I am not laughing”
“I am and, I have not laughed like this in days”
“Still want to talk about it?”
“About what?”
“The reason why you cried the way you did that day?”
“Will it make you feel good?”
“Perhaps”
“You want to spoil this moment that had made me feel better?”
“It wasn’t my intention”
“Good”
She brought out a pack of Benson and Hedges from her brown leather bag, drew a stick carefully like a spartan in the presence of a confused enemy and passed the pack.
“I will pass” I said
She stretched her face a bit,in shock ,stared at my lips for evidence and hid her box of sin in her bag and cleared her throat, like she was trying to remove the last pebble of impurities from her broken soul and bade herself time.
I was waiting for her to speak. She knew that she needed to speak and when she finally did, it embodied everything that was not needed.
“Well, I was in love with this guy for 5 years. He had everything I wanted in a man but we drifted a bit and that was it. So, he called and said that it was over. I least expected him to end it the way he did but he did. Life is crazy you know….”
I shook my head in agreement.
“One minute, you are feeling like the only girl in the world and next minute, you are on your bed, under your sheet hoping you will die”
“And it keeps coming back, the memory of it all, the joy, the laughter that end in tears” I said!
“Exactly!
“I know that you are hurt and, I wouldn’t tell you that I have a solution to your problems. I can’t even solve mine. But there seems to be one solution that time has often times declared useless: everyone will tell you to move on. It is easy to say but they won’t tell you how. It is much easier to be said and much harder to be done but one thing is important, that you discover yourself and live life your own way.
“I have always been a creative person and a deep lover too but people take advantage of that to exploit my emotions, people around made me look like I was the biggest failure of all times because I couldn’t meet their bullish expectations. Life has been brutish, rough and tough. Still, I have several reasons to be grateful for the little things that I have been getting, for the person whom I am becoming, fearless and fierce. I owned my struggle and, it gave me strength. Even though they seem far from over, I kept putting in my best, with the energy of conquering lion.
Perhaps, it happened for a reason and only you will determine whether if it is worth it”
“you talk like those philosophy advocates that I met sometime ago” she said!
“oh really?” I asked
She nodded and smiled and it was beautiful.
To be continued…
